The ideal pace for the body to receive healing touch is very slow. Bodies can move quickly, yet speedy physical movement can sometimes lead to staying in one’s head, a sense of rushed anxiety and even injury. This can become a self-perpetuating cycle. The massage table is a perfect place for body to cycle down and become re-imprinted with the health benefits of deliberate movement. Ideally, a healing touch practitioner aids this slowing down process with an unhurried application of the hands. Don’t let guilt, caretaking, or habit prevent you from switching practitioners, even if the relationship is long-term, if your practitioner does not help you adjust the pace of your life downward — or for any reason at all.

Becoming a good receiver is crucial to maximizing the pleasure and health benefits of bodywork. No matter what modality, an optimal bodywork session is one in which you the client are loosely, non-mentally focused and aware inside your body. To facilitate this “locus of focus”, talking should be kept to a minimum, centered on moment-to-moment needs and requests. Feel free to make lots of those! A bodywork session is a time to allow all your immediate physical needs to be addressed, and a good practitioner welcomes your petitions for water, kleenex, lighter touch, or another moment or two on that foot. If your practitioner initiates conversation and you notice that you are not as able to stay present in your body, let her know that you are finding conversation distracting. If she persists, make that session your last with that person – a bodywork practitioner must aid you in becoming more embodied, not take you out into your head.

Find yourself endlessly spinning thoughts and visions during your session? It’s an organic occurrence, as bodywork connects the mind, spirit, emotions and body more efficiently than during untouched moments. As best you can, remind yourself that you can pursue that picture of the ideal job possibility or tough issue with your spouse after your treatment, and return your awareness to your body, breathing deeply. Slow, effortless breathing, especially the outbreath, aids in muscle relaxation and is most called for during deep tissue massage of a particularly tight or painful muscle.

My first masseur (the masculine form of the popularly but malapropriately applied feminine form ‘masseuse’) back in 1989 gave me a guideline that I continue to repeat to my clients to this day: “Never help the practitioner”. Raising your head or your legs to aid in pillow adjustment is a no-no: worst case scenario has just-released muscles spasming worse than before from being forced to go from a state of deep relaxation to one of sudden contraction. Become “heavy-limbed”, and allow the practitioner to move your body parts for you – practicing surrender of control does a body good.

Sometimes a bodywork session will stir old emotions as a result of a particular area being touched, rocked, massaged or otherwise manipulated. I recommend taking advantage of this by fully allowing vocal, non-verbal expression in moans, sighs, cries, tears, and involuntary jerking (also known as kriyas). A sensitive practitioner will ride this wave with you, compassionately yet matter-of-factly supporting you in those moments; another reason to switch practitioners if this is not the case.

Nearly every receiver finds her or himself at one time or another having a sexual response to non-sexual healing touch. This can be embarrassing or confusing, but such a physical response is perfectly normal. Significant sexual energy is stored in hips, buttocks and legs and can spontanously begin flowing during a session when those areas are addressed. If this happens to you, continue deeply breathing, stay in your body, allow your response to run its course without comment, and the responsible practitioner will do likewise.